Uche Urum-Eke
By Ekeoma Uche
IN LOVING MEMORY OF MY DEAREST SISTER NENA NDENYI NGOZI UCHE
I grew up in the village. In my mind, I have always accused my older siblings of eating up all the silver and living me with oshishi nkom (wooden spoon). So while Ndenyi passed through upscale St. Savious Primary School in Ikoyi, I was at Trans Ekulu Primary across the rail line in coal city, Enugu. Naturally, by exposure and training we are supposed to be miles apart. This became apparent twenty years ago, enjoying my sleep in Dolphin Estate, Ndenyi called amidst some serious sobbing. She went on and on, “they've killed her, they've killed her”. I asked who they killed, she momentarily appeared surprised at my question. She asked if I wasn't watching TV, I reminded her it was between 1am-2am Nigerian time. She then answered my question. “Princess Diana is dead!” That was news all right but certainly not the type a Trans Ekulu product will lose sleep over, not to talk of crying!
That was Ndenyi, passionate about God and people who made or were making positive impacts in human race…wherever or whoever they were. Princess Diana was her role model and she found solace following her. Its ironical her demise is just 2 days apart to Princess Diana's and exactly 20 years after her idol passed on. In her illustrious career as a journalist, she wined and dined with important personalities around the world whether it was author Alex Haley of Roots or astronaut Neil Armstrong of Apollo 2 and covered landmark events like the commissioning of the then recently acquired liquefied natural gas ships in Bonny Island. Ndenyi was full of adventure; she travelled extensively, hiked Cameroun Mountain, skied in the Alps and visited us in Sweden! That visit is unforgettable. I had just gone for trials in my football club, IFK Lidingo...that should be in 1986. I played with canvas and my coach asked that I replace it but I had no money. She came swooped in and bought me the boots and I went on to sign after 6 months of waiting for FIFA clearance. Yes, FIFA clearance. My club didn't believe I was not signed unto any club even in Nigeria and didn't want FIFA hammer. We won the junior league, I won the club highest scorer medal and just nicked the MVP award. I also went on to play competitive matches and train with the Swedish junior national team. Some of my mates played at the USA “94 World Cup. She literally made me the rookie to watch and gave me a shoulder high gait.
My big sis, laid the foundation for my spiritual rebirth and that of the entire Agwu Uche clan. She lived a fasted and giving life. I have no idea how she got converted but as much as my teenage and adult life can recollect, Ndenyi lived as much as possible a godly lifestyle. Despite being an original S.U. her identity was never lost in her fashion sense. Infact, long before the shawl became a fashion statement somehow she had elevated the scarf to fit into virtually all her outfits. And, can we forget her rich collection of gospel artists like Amy Grant and the likes? I still have a stack of those that she sent with other gifts to me at my wedding.
In my recollection, one of the happiest moments of our family was the supposed wedding to Ogb (as he is fondly called), that never was. Ironically, it was also one of the lowest moments of our family. It strained relationship between families and between mother and daughter in particular and understandably so. It took decades to resolve and thankfully too. Years down the line, Ndenyi raked up degrees from Ivy League schools of Massachusetts Institute of Technology (MIT) and Harvard University.
I have struggled to accept the inevitable. I hoped against hope and prayed and believed for a miracle…that the God Ndenyi served passionately from youth will ultimately show up for her. I had fantasized how I will share the testimony of God’s healing power over Ndenyi. That has not happened and as the ultimate source of life, God has the final say and it's been a pretty bitter pill to swallow. Part of what has made it so is the stark reality that all our life's worth is reduced to a piece of paper and at most few pages. 1 Cor.3:13 puts it this way; "Every man's work shall be made manifest: for the day shall declare it, because it shall be revealed by fire; and the fire shall try every man's work of what sort it is".
Ekeoma Uche